Hey there everyone!!
I know I’m awesome. I possess many talents, have developed many skills, and have done a tremendous amount of personal growth through various therapies and programs over decades.
And, I’ve learned that many successes in life don’t come from an individual’s merits, but rather from the cohesiveness of a complete team.
That’s where I feel I have I’ve really been given a raw deal.
Starting with the first team of family, I didn’t get much. I understand that most families could be qualified as being dysfunction, so I don’t say this lightly. I’ve had less than a dozen conversations in my entire life with my father (despite my efforts). Other than financial support (mostly through welfare) until the age of eighteen, I didn’t get much… I didn’t even get a genuine hug, let alone seeing a role model to know what it is like to become a man.
My brother may have had the same experience, but he didn’t have to deal with having albinism and being blind (nor did he support me as an older brother). I imagine that many people who grow up without a father figure could “see” what’s happening with other friends or in the media. To this day, I feel some members of my family still don’t get (or choose to support) my physical limitations.
When playing sports, I was always the last person to get picked for teams. This makes sense, of course, because I would be the weakest player no matter what the sport. I remember being the goalie in floor hockey, and I never even saved one shot. Eventually, I was told that I was unable to play any sports, and was deprived physical education classes of all kinds.
It wasn’t much different with school projects. Nobody wanted to work with me. Once in history class, I thought I was assigned to an awesome group of people. Unfortunately, I got lost on the TTC (public transit) while going to one of the group meetings. Because of that, the group convinced our teacher that I didn’t contribute anything and I was given a failing grade.
At lunch time, I would try to sit at large tables so there was ample opportunity to have people sit beside me. But nobody would sit beside me. One day I was sitting at a small table with just one other empty chair, thinking that maybe a different dynamic would yield a better result. I thought it worked when a woman approached me to ask if the seat was taken. I excitedly say, “It’s free!” and then the woman grabbed the chair and took it to another table, leaving me all alone with no other chairs.
I thought I was finally part of a winning team when I was a co-producer for a musical. There was still something missing, though. As an example, one time I found out that the entire team went out to a big social pow-wow at Canada’s Wonderland (amusement park) without even asking me. When I inquired to find out why, they said that because it was an outdoor activity, that I wouldn’t be interested due to my skin condition. When I shared that that was a big assumption which was inaccurate, they didn’t show any remorse.
Still, I loved this group of people and wanted the relationships to continue. Being responsible for setting up on-line ticketing, I asked my partner to please check the accuracy of the ticket since our physical address had changed (as I was unable to read the ticket that would be printed). The new ticket was not checked, and it did have the wrong address. Apparently, it was still “my” responsibility to get it right and I was dismissed from the team after this incident.
Since I couldn’t find team players, despite my efforts, I thought I’d make it a numbers game. For years, I went to as many networking events as possible, attempting to connect with as many people as possible.
While I connected with thousands of people and broke Facebook records for number of friends, I wasn’t creating the dynamic team that I had envisioned.
Even through the power of network marketing, I couldn’t create the right team. I saw many others create teams that became profitable, and I even taught others how to build large followings and significantly increase their financial wealth.
Eventually, I did recruit someone who became a superstar and now I collect a small royalty from that huge business. That’s great, but it’s greater for that guy who makes literally 500 times as much money as I do.
I have sought out many doctors, healers, and holistic practitioners over the years. Some of them have been OK, and a few have been great. However, none of them seem to be team players.
They reside in their own ivory tower and are a slave to bureaucracy. For example, it would take many months for my general physician to simply contact my psychiatrist. And it would never be real-time or over the phone—just through letters. My feeling is that those letters are just quickly skimmed and not really understood. Moreover, they go-back-and-forth arguing, from telling me I need therapy to telling me I don’t.
There’s No “I” in Team
Yet, “I” am the common variable that must exist in a team. Where do I find my teammates? How do I create a winning team?
Let’s love the world together…
[)anish /|hmed, blind visionary